i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
