so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
