stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
