Porn is love you can see.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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