when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I feel like abortions should bother me more
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
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