They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
