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spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
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