That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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