someone get that fucking seahorse.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
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so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
You need a sexual gate keeper
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
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