He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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