He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
