Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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