I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
