We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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