A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
