I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
