Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
