Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize