I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
