you traded sex for a burrito?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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