I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Randomize
