it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Randomize
