I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then my night got REAL pukey
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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