Having a random hookup so left but love u
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize