Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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