This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
