You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
