so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I came so hard my ears popped.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
