Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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