he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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