that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
