That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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