I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
smell my finger.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
