So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
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we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
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He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.