I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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