Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
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