I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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