just come out here and I will go home with you...
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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