would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
