so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
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