If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
