Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
