And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
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If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
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Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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