dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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