I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
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