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• (812): View more from Indiana

  How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?

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• (845): View more from New York

  i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.

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• (949): View more from California

  I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent

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• (801): View more from Utah

  You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?

  (650): View more from California

  I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.

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• (936): View more from Texas

  We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year

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• (585): View more from New York

  I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken

  (1+44): View more from

  ...What??

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