All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
