OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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