i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits