yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
