a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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