Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
